I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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