oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
