I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
