O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Randomize
