I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Randomize
