the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
