that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Randomize
