Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
