Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize
