Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize