Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
