Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Randomize
