she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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