I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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