i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
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