it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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