so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
