Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
The dick lei will go down in squad history
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
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