After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Randomize
