My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Randomize
