We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
