Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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