I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
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