Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Randomize
