Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Randomize
