Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
