Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
should my penis look like a turkey
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Randomize
