I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Randomize
