Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
Randomize
