just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Randomize
