I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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