I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Randomize
