don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Randomize
