I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize