Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I am mentally ready for anal.
Randomize
