im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
