i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
