He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
