I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Let the clothes fall where they may.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
