WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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