At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
