Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
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