Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
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