Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
