Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Randomize