I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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