he wants to bone in the snuggie
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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