Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Text me some of your sweat
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
