we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize
