Please don't use social media to get back at me.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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