i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize