WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
